In the meantime, I’ve been anxiously counting down the hours ‘til I head out again. I’m both chomping at the bit and resisting the lead. I want to head out as soon as possible, but I also wish I didn’t have to leave at all. I’m torn between spending my winter fishing and hiking everyday, and just holing myself up in my bedroom for the whole winter playing World of Warcraft, and re-learning how to play the guitar after being without it for almost the entire year. I want to be the most productive and energetic person in the universe, as well as the most lazy and boring person, at the same time. I guess I will soon find balance instead of being torn between two extremes, especially once I arrive in Washington and establish a routine. 

But, right now, things are crazy for me and my little household, and I’m not quite sure what to do with everything going on. I guess I’m doing my best. Listening to the music I’ve been listening to has definitely helped keep me sane and focused, as music always does for me. I don’t know what state I’d be in if I didn’t have unlimited access to the music I like right now. I’d probably be a lot more stressed, anxious, and depressed. I’d probably be a lot less organized and productive. I’d probably have a much shorter fuse than usual, and also be much quicker to cry. I’d just be such a terrible mess. 

But, thanks to the music I’ve been listening to, I’m finding ways to cope with the craziness in my life right now. Not only am I coping with life, I’m actually feeling relatively okay. I'm physically well. Mentally, I'm managing. Spiritually, I'm confident. Overall, I'm alright. 

I’m not quite sure where I was going with this. As you can tell, I’m having a hard time sitting down and focusing, and putting my feelings into words. Hopefully, within the next few weeks or so, I’ll be back to working on my memoir and writing as usual. Perhaps, that’s why I referred to the music I love. Sometimes, I can’t really express myself with words too well, but I can express myself with the rhythms and chords of the music I’m into. 

I’ll end this blog with links to the three songs I think best describe what life has been like for me lately without words (again, I don’t usually listen to music for the lyrics. I listen to music for, well, the music). 

Scott H. Biram ~ Muleskinner Blues: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RvYFRRYYX2c

Tyler Childers ~ Whitehouse Road: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjftvOLs0Y0

Hank III ~ Smoke and Wine: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HcDFLfwGQGo