However, I have a lot of hurdles to clear before I go to CU Denver (and it’s not just the admissions process that stands between myself and CU Denver). CU Denver is literally part of downtown Denver. One of Denver’s busiest roads, Speer Boulevard, cuts right through the campus, and CU Denver shares its campus with two other schools: Metro State University and Community College of Denver. When I toured there, I could already feel the anxiety of being in such a crowded, busy place. However, compared to the uneasy feelings I felt while touring quieter (and fancier) schools like Colorado School of Mines and Colorado Christian University, the ones I felt at CU Denver weren’t nearly as bad. 

I mean… I was born and raised in Denver. I even went to school for a few years just six blocks south of CU Denver. When I attended GALS all those years ago, I got used to the city life eventually. I never really liked it, but I didn’t feel trapped by the city either. In fact, some of the friends I made at that school who lived in the heart of Denver were happy to invite me to their houses, and show me around all of the cool hangout places they knew of, which included art galleries, cafes, and hole-in-the-wall stores that were totally worth walking alongside heavy traffic for blocks at a time. It wasn’t until I moved to the outskirts of Littleton and started attending significantly smaller, quieter schools that my fear of the city grew to the point that it is now.

Nowadays, I avoid the city whenever and however I can. I only go downtown if I have to, or I’m promised a meal at the Buckhorn Exchange. 

Once down there, the panic doesn’t take long to settle in. The tall buildings, combined with the traffic and the crowds are overwhelming to me. There’s just too much going on for my brain to handle.