Not even five years ago, I was scared of my own shadow. My confidence was under the ground, and my social life was pretty much non-existent. I was bullied so badly in my first middle school, that I had to change schools. My bullies scared me into silence and destroyed whatever confidence and self-esteem I had. My teachers weren't great in that school either, and I ended up serving detention every single day because I was "too lazy to do my homework." 

When I started going to my second middle school, which was an all girls school that focused on leadership, that fear and self doubt was pretty evident, but the students there accepted and embraced me immediately. Still, I was depressed, anxious, and afraid. I didn't know where to turn. I was in therapy twice a week, in a school that gave us lessons on confidence and leadership, and in Tae Kwon Do sparring. I should've felt empowered and confident. I should've been trusting of the students and staff alike. But I couldn't get myself to trust anyone no matter what. And I certainly did not feel empowered or confident. 

I fell into a pretty deep pit of depression, and questioned if life was really worth living. I wanted something, but I didn't know what I wanted. I knew I wanted confidence, bravery, and the ability to trust again, but I didn't have a way to get there. I saw Tae Kwon Do as a chore, and didn't always enjoy it. I saw school as school, and even though I wasn't being bullied or chastised by ignorant teachers the first year, I couldn't get over what the previous school had done to me, and I dreaded waking up in the mornings to go to a place I didn't want to go.