The rest of winter beyond the holidays just sucks major ass. I think about 1/3rd of Americans get a good case of SAD every winter, including myself, because the weather is awful most of the time, and everyone is stuck going to work and school during the winter. I also tend to get sick for basically the entire winter, regardless if I actually have an infection, simply because of how rough the weather is on me. 

With the increase of anti-vaxxers sending their living smallpox blankets to school, who then come into contact with my little brother, who then touches everything in the house with his grubby little fingers without spending more than five seconds washing his hands first, I expect to get more infections than usual until the government finally closes all of the loopholes that allow those drooling idiots to send their uncontrolled petri dishes to school. 

There’s only so much I can do to prevent myself from getting sick. I did get my flu vaccine this year, a little later than what I was comfortable with, but that wasn’t my fault. Turns out every hospital except for one little office didn’t get them until the middle of November, and because of my health insurance, I can’t just walk into any store and get it. Trust me, I’ve tried, but those damn pharmacists practically run a background check on me just to make sure I’m not insured before giving me a free shot, which is really stupid. 

I should be allowed to get my damn flu shot from anywhere at anytime and be prioritized, especially since even the tamest flu has a 50/50 chance of killing me. But noooooo, that’s not how our retarded, er I mean, our profoundly stupid health care shit works in ‘Merica! 

I have hand sanitizer in nearly every room of the house, in my truck, and on my backpack, and rub it all over my hands and arms at least ten times a day. I also disinfect the house everyday during the winter, which hopefully kills off all of the dangerous germs before my brother comes home from school and ruins all of my hard work. But, I always end up sick, and pretty much stay that way until the last snow of the season. At the moment, I’m dealing with sinus issues that have been a problem for over a month now. My illness hasn’t gotten any worse or better, and my breathing has not been affected. So, I’m pretty damn sure I’m just allergic to winter. 

I might actually enjoy winter a lot more if I wasn’t so sick and cold for the entire season. Yet, here I am, chugging down tea I honestly ate the taste of, but was told by my actual doctor would help me with my post-nasal drip issues (and she was right), wearing three heavy hoodies, two pairs of wool socks, long underwear, and thick jeans, shivering under a down feather comforter with the heat on full-blast and my warm little dog curled up by my side. 

I really don’t want to leave the warmth of my bed to take my dog outside, but I know he’ll be whining at me to take him out in less than an hour, which means I’ll have to stand outside in the bitter cold while the little turd takes his sweet time finding the perfect place to do his business. Then, I’ll come inside shivering so hard I’ll have a difficult time taking off my boots and setting them up by the front door, so I don’t trip and die on them when Friday’s blizzard knocks out the power for a few hours. Then, I’ll throw myself back into bed and shiver for another hour until I finally warm up again, just enough to stop violently shaking, but not enough to actually feel warm. I’ve only felt warm for a couple hours over Thanksgiving. I was asleep for those two hours, curled up between two other people, shoulder-to-shoulder with them. 

Also, even though I probably ate close to 10% of my total body weight in food on Thanksgiving and just finished an entire 2 pound salmon filet hardly two hours ago, I’m hungry again. I don’t want to stand up in the kitchen to cook because I’ll get very cold, but I have to. And before anyone asks me why I don’t just turn the heat on. I did. It’s blowing continuously at 80 degrees. Problem is, my grandparents’ house is very open with vaulted ceilings, and has lots of drafty windows that don’t stop sucking hot air out even when they’re tightly closed and the blinds are drawn.

Also, heat rises. Cold air sinks. I’m pretty sure it’s nice and toasty up by the ceiling (in fact, based on the temperature in the upstairs hallway, it is), but it’s basically the North Pole on the ground. The tile and hardwood floors don’t help with that at all. 

With that, it looks like my dog is ready to make me spend ten minutes outside with him, and I’m so damn hungry right now since I’m thinking about food again. 

But before I go, I forgot to bitch about glasses. As someone who’s only been wearing glasses to drive and read far away menus since early September, nobody ever told me that foggy glasses in the cold is a very real and very annoying thing. Thankfully, I don’t really need them to see well in daily life (I just can’t read menus or road signs, or pick out tiny details from a distance without them), but I feel really bad for those who do. How the hell do you deal with going blind every time you exhale in the cold?! 

Also, I’m broke as shit this holiday season. I hope everyone is satisfied with my cooking and artwork, cuz that’s what everyone is getting this year!